Moving is Scary for Kids

From our adult perspective, relocating centers around timing, packing, transferring finances, getting help -- all of the serious but bothersome elements that we know will not even be issues a few weeks after the move takes place. But what about the little people who have no say in the matter? Even if a move to another place represents an exciting change, it can also be a scary specter, filled with visions of the unknown. New people, places and experiences will be so different from the home and neighborhood in which they may have taken their first steps, made theirr first friends, ridden their first bikes, made their first homerun or kicked their first soccer ball.

Sometimes it isn’t only a matter of fear. Some kids just want to pretend it can’t be happening. New Hampshire mom Lynn Calogerro, who moved with a 5- year old some time back, reported, "He was convinced that he couldn't possibly move, because his Nana wouldn't be able to find the house, because Santa already had established us at our current chimney location, and because he just knew that in the end his toys would not get delivered to the right house and right room.. "We actually had to have an artist come in and air-brush his new room with Tonka trucks to bribe him to leave our old house."

Shelley Seale, in womentodaymagazine.com gives us some good tips about easing the trauma of moving for our kids.

“Being informed is very important to children," she says. "One of the worst mistakes we can make as adults is to assume that kids don't care or won't understand the details. Keeping them ‘in the loop,’ consulting them about choices whenever possible, and including them in the family game plan will work wonders toward their adjustment"

Seale goes on to say that different age groups have anxiety over different things. Preschool children, for example may worry about being left behind, or being separated from their parents. Giving them a job to do, such as boxing up their favorite toys, and "labeling" their boxes with crayons and stickers can help them get onboard with the process.

Elementary age kids are usually most concerned with how the everyday routines of their lives are going to change, says Seale. This age group is more responsive to pictures, videos and magazines of their new home. If they have activities in which they regularly participate, sharing information about a new dance studio, a new soccer association or a new gymnastics program in the new area can help create excitement and curiosity.

Teens, most concerned with fitting in, may react angrily to the move -- something over which they have no control. Friends, schools, jobs, clothing, hairstyles, – all the things to which they have just acclimated in their highly transitional years will no doubt look vastly different to them in the new city. An teen orientation trip may be in order so that they can see schools they will be attending, etc.

Source: http://hubpages.com/hub/More-Than-a-Move-Relocation-Trauma-for-Kids

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